Satisfied.

Sometimes it would be so much easier.

Settle for the typical American life.

Husband. 2 or 3 kids. Job that pays just enough for us to get by.

It would be easier to be satisfied with what everyone else is satisfied, rather than have these big dreams and plans. With expectations. Goals.

And half expecting to fail.

It would be easier. But, maybe I don't always want what's easiest.

I've always been the type of person that wants to know my life impacts someone, even in the smallest way. I'm not always happy with school and family and such because it doesn't seem like I can make that big impact. Skip high school. Skip college. Let me go work with kids in Uganda or Indonesia or the Phillippines and let me know that I'm that light in their lives. Let me know that I can die and my life will mean something to someone else. Let me burn out bright.

I want to change the world.

Even if it's only a few peoples' worlds.

More than anything. I want to know I've made a change in what's around me.

I want to know I'm not useless. And that my life was used by God. That something came of pain and joy and failures and victories.

kadi.